from Nov 9, 2017

12:41 PM

I should bring this thing back.  Maybe call it TBT, Twitter Before Twitter now that they sold out and let you type more characters.

from Apr 22, 2009

9:38 AM

I created this mininoggins thing so i could just post quick little thoughts without having to post a whole post in the main noggins. It's like what Twitter is now.. So you know, I basically invented Twitter. you're welcome Gavin Newsome.

Labels: , , , ,

from Mar 30, 2009

11:01 AM

do you know what would be funny?
replacing the word "CAUTION" on everything with "HEY STUPID"

from Mar 16, 2009

10:38 AM

I was taking a crap earlier and was thinking... what if we actually hired someone in a wheelchair? That would make using the handicapped stall suck.

from Feb 27, 2009

12:22 PM

Most elephants weigh less than the tongue of a blue whale.
imagine an elephant, the tongue of something.

when the blue whales grow legs and adapt to life on land, is when we are all fucked.

8:38 AM

2 gig Micro SD cards. mind blowing. I think we got it from Roswell.

from Feb 23, 2009

10:58 AM

Just when I thought WinnCo couldnt get any better, they go and start selling these.

Labels: ,

from Feb 20, 2009

2:04 PM

The shop bathroom here smells like piss in a bad way. I know its a bathroom but damn, are they just pissing right on the floor? The urinals and toilets are there so the pee goes somewhere else.

from Feb 11, 2009

9:46 AM

I was in line behind a hooker this morning at McDonalds.

from Dec 12, 2008

11:39 AM

Imagine finding all the cigarette buts in all the ashtrays and beer cans from after a party. Then, dissecting them for all the left over tobacco. Then, use that, instead of coffee grounds for a pot of coffee. that's what my coffee tasted like today.

it was starbucks.

from Nov 12, 2008

9:16 PM

i got some new Rootbeers from BevMo... this Kutztown Sarsparilla tastes like Vics Vapo-Rub

from Nov 3, 2008

12:36 PM

is it wrong that i lick out the remnants of the hot mustard when i'm done?

from Oct 28, 2008

9:16 AM

note to Netflix and other movie sites; "Independent" and "Foreign" are NOT genres.
its annoying.

from Sep 25, 2008

12:50 PM

I dont know if they just stopped caring or what, but the ghetto Mcdonalds by my work is like a homeless shelter before 7am.

from Sep 11, 2008

7:44 AM

ew! i just wiped a booger under my desk.. over on of my old boogers.

from Sep 4, 2008

10:01 AM

"you can set your DVR to record any show whenever its on... but dont do Oprah, she's on all different channels all the same time all over. She'll freeze up your DVR"

from Aug 25, 2008

12:44 PM

i hate it when you microwave food and cautiously take a bite, because the last one was super hot and flinch because you think its really hot but its actually frozen still.

from Aug 11, 2008

10:32 AM

  • Bernie Mac,
  • Chef.. I mean Isaac Hayes

from Jul 25, 2008

9:30 AM

I like the term "hobo" its way more fun than "bum" or "homeless"
it implies a bit of character.
"homeless" depresses me. bums are just bums. fuckin' bums!

Hobo's take the train!

from Jul 16, 2008

8:01 AM

I fucking hate it when people comment Anonymously!

from Jul 14, 2008

12:20 PM

Not only can I not write in cursive anymore, some of these passive aggressive notes are making me realize I can no longer read cursive either. Writing in cursive is a pain in the ass and so is reading it. Why was it even invented?
I'm starting to even hate serif fonts.

from Jun 11, 2008

6:53 AM

HAPPY 6-11!

from Jun 10, 2008

12:17 PM

The Fast Food Drive-Thru.

Considering these factors

  • The potential language barrier.
  • Low quality intercom system.
  • complexity of my order.

I've decided that the margin of error is too great and pretty much given up on them.

thank you, drive through.

from Jun 4, 2008

10:19 AM

If Zombies eat brains, why are they so dumb?

from May 28, 2008

1:26 PM

Lifting the toilet seat. We hate lifting it, and sometimes forget. Hows about both of us put the top lid down. It looks nicer, and it shares the burden equally.

from May 13, 2008

11:15 AM

A guy asked me for $2 so he could get gas this morning. I told him I didnt have any cash even tho I totally had like $8 in ones in my pocket. Sorry god.

from Apr 25, 2008

12:50 PM

The only reason I get fries at McDonald's is for the Hot Mustard sauce
those fuckers gave me Honey Mustard.. yack-a-dack
NOT THE SAME THING! I can get stupid Honey Mustard at Burger King.

from Apr 10, 2008

9:17 AM

San Francisco to Protesters: "HAA HAAA!"

from Mar 24, 2008

2:11 PM

i wish i could download all the shit from my brain and post it on my blog. my blog would be like .. i dunno 60 times better.

from Mar 5, 2008

2:48 PM

Safeway's Eating Right "Spicy Thai Noodle Soup" tasted like drainage from a Thai restaurant dumpster with shredded cardboard and black pepper boiled into it.

from Feb 19, 2008

1:54 PM

KB: are you still at the same job?
me: yea, i hate every day
KB: ouch... sorry... yeah, I'm still doing this, which I'm not to crazy about
KB: but like you... Have to do it
KB: I'm to fat for porn
me: thats the funniest shit i've heard in a while, thanks!

from Feb 6, 2008

4:57 PM

holy shit, now that the archive is all orgagnizered, I just realized that I have a full 2 years and 2 months of blogs on here . Damn, thats either prolific or pathetic... its Protheletic.

thanks and stuff.

from Jan 28, 2008

8:45 AM

you ever go to a taqueriua and order pork, then someone you're with orders chicken and your meat looks exactly the same?

That happened at a place in Oakland once... i was like "dude i think we both got chihuahua"

from Jan 25, 2008

1:49 PM

i'm sending this from my phone....


from Jan 17, 2008

9:59 AM

from Jan 14, 2008

1:34 PM

i love fun
everything else pretty much sucks

from Jan 9, 2008

12:20 PM

Ranch is NOT pizza sauce! and belongs nowhere near pizza.

from Jan 7, 2008

9:32 AM

here's a tip, if an email you get says "this is not a scam" its probably a scam.

from Dec 21, 2007

9:12 AM

If you don't laugh at this I will send you $1. thats a noggins guarantee!

from Nov 28, 2007

3:11 PM

i love banana chips as much as the next guy, but i have a serious issue with them being "salt and pepper" flavored

alas, i keep eating them when i walk by the bowl.

9:29 AM

Fucking Ringback tones. thanks, now i get get put on hold with crappy music when i call my friends.

from Nov 26, 2007

2:59 PM

If dogs are color blind... why do they have different colored fur?

from Nov 13, 2007

2:58 PM

This has been pissing me off lately. People who use THEN instead of THAN

from Nov 2, 2007

2:22 PM

i have a new pet peeve. 2 minute long videos on Youtube with 90 seconds of credits and intros.

from Nov 1, 2007

7:40 AM

I took a shit now my wrist hurts. I think its from wiping.
I think its the angle and the fact I sprained it a couple weeks ago.

I dont want to have to wipe lefty.

from Oct 26, 2007

8:10 AM

RedSox + stolen base = FREE TACOS!
Taco Tuesday. Get your free taco bell taco.

from Oct 24, 2007

8:28 AM

is your TV on fire like mine is?
on the news its "

this is when all the Retardzionaires in this country should step up.
why dont you not have gold flake covered chocolate for desert one night and help build some houses for people.

fire your ass wiper toilet attendant for a month and use that money to help some people out you greedy fucks.

from Oct 19, 2007

8:08 AM

Mini Noggins is back by popular demand. I would'nt say 10 votes is being popular but I looks like you guys wanted this back and hated the chat. The poll also showed that many of you like waffles.

from May 10, 2007

12:14 PM

i dropped a couple of the lose olives from my pizza into my chicken penne lean cuisine and one olive slice has more flavor than the entire lean cuisine.

from Apr 12, 2007

12:46 PM

...mustard mayonnaise?

no, just mustard

'squirt' on top of the cheese

Can you put a little more on the bread side?

squirt on top of the mustard on the cheese.

-i hate people.

from Mar 30, 2007

10:44 AM

i'd imagine spit from toothless crack whores would burn like acid if you got it on you.

from Mar 16, 2007

3:38 PM

i've come to the conclusion that i like the Hot Mustard better than the actual McNuggets.. and that the nuggets are a mere Hot Mustard delivery device

from Mar 6, 2007

10:03 AM

i hate it when i walk out into the shop and hear like 2 seconds of KFOG and it fucks up my head for the rest of the day.
I have "She's an Easy Lover" by Phill Collins stuck in my head now.

from Mar 1, 2007

11:49 AM

[11:44] d3fective: slow day at work today?
[11:44] kirksucks611:
[11:45] d3fective: I just had a gnarly looking pimple thing on my forearm.
[11:45] d3fective: it had a little tiny hair sticking out from the middle.
[11:46] kirksucks611:
ingrown hair?
[11:46] kirksucks611: was it hella long when you pulled it out?
[11:46] d3fective: like maybe 1/16 of an inch long
[11:46] d3fective: I pulled it out and it was HELLLLA long
[11:46] d3fective: and puss just started to ooze out
[11:46] kirksucks611:
that is fucking awesome!
[11:46] kirksucks611: congrats man..
[11:47] d3fective: thanks
[11:47] d3fective: lol

from Feb 5, 2007

11:30 AM

netflix is pretty rad.

blockbuster is trying to get in on that action. they say they're better because you can drop your movies off at the store and get a new one there..

but the problem with that is, i got Netflix so i wouldnt ever have to go to the store. and on top of that the store has a shit selection.

fuck you blockbuster. I left you when Hollywood moved into town. now i have Netflix.

eat that.

from Jan 26, 2007

7:56 AM

i forgot to blog about how pissed i am at McDonald's coffee cup lids right now
it literally spilled on me the entire drive from McDee's to my desk. leaking out the back of the lid
now i have wet spots on my crotch and sweatshirt

from Jan 15, 2007

9:14 AM

i learned where they got 666 from
its from roman numerals

I =1 V=5 X=10 L=50 C=100 D=500

if you add D + C + L+ X + V + I : 500 + 100 + 50 + 10 + 5 + 1,
it equals 666 the number of the beast!

i think the church did this so people would be afraid of math or something.

fucking assholes

from Dec 29, 2006

11:14 AM

jimbo: I tried to skate when I was younger
jimbo: but I sucked
jimbo: I was ok at rollerblading
jimbo: But BMX racing was my thing.
kirk sucks: yea
kirk sucks: i never got into either
kirk sucks: i had a Dyno freestyle bike once but it got stolen
kirk sucks: and rollerblades are for fags
kirk sucks: its kinda a requirement to hate rollerbladers when you skateboard. sorry
jimbo: I wouldn't consider myself a rollerblader
jimbo: so what ever
jimbo: I was all about the BMX
jimbo: my friend and I would race them
jimbo: he was skinny and won all the time
jimbo: I came in 2nd once

from Dec 6, 2006

10:51 AM

from Dec 5, 2006

10:02 AM

from Nov 9, 2006

8:51 AM

I spilled like a droplet of syrup on my pants .. I even cleaned it off with water.. but its all I can smell!!! I keep getting luscious whiffs of pancakes... its like torture. Damn you Aunt Jemima!

from Oct 24, 2006

10:29 AM

they didnt fuck my name up on my Starbucks cup! distinctly written as K I R K. way to go starbucks chick who i've never seen working there before!

from Oct 11, 2006

2:06 PM

from Oct 9, 2006

1:31 PM

dear Anonymous commenters,
your wit and humor is lost because i dont know who the hell you are. please, if youre gonna comment anonymously, leave a name or something. and if you post anonymously like a pussy stop hiding behind your anonymitiy and man up.

from Sep 20, 2006

11:20 AM

what the fuck am i gonna do with all these damn pennies

from Sep 12, 2006

12:16 PM

i dont know if any of you even read this side bar blog but I just wanted to let you know I updated the In-N-Out Fantasy Menu. if you dont know what that is i suggest you check it out.

from Aug 29, 2006

1:35 PM

word of the day:
–adjective, -li‧er, -li‧est.
1.churlishly rude or bad-tempered: a surly waiter.
2.unfriendly or hostile; menacingly irritable: a surly old lion.
3.dark or dismal; menacing; threatening: a surly sky.
4.Obsolete. lordly; arrogant.

from Aug 28, 2006

12:42 PM

I hate microsoft word.

from Aug 25, 2006

11:31 AM

me: what if we used buckles as a form of currency
rita: We'd need BIG pockets
me: 15.99 would be 15 buckles and 99 buttons.
and our pants would fall down from having no belts and pockets full of heavy brass buckles
rita: so that would be a vote against using buckles for currency in my opinion
me: it would be funny tho

from Aug 1, 2006

10:10 AM

Have i been to harsh on jesus lately? im sorry if i offended anyone. but there's so much shit that keeps giving Jesus a bad reputation.

from Jul 5, 2006

8:27 AM

another little FUCK YOU to myspace. i tried to post the fireworks blog in the Myspace Martinez groups and it kept giving me errors. so, again, FUCK YOU MYSPACE! i dont know what i was thinking.

from Jun 26, 2006

12:10 PM

from Jun 22, 2006

4:53 PM

if any of you cared, dude got the Sidekick back from those fuckers.
NYtimes article. homeboy is famous now.. he's going on Good Morning America tomorrow.

those Corona fuckers just got served.

from Jun 6, 2006

9:01 AM

i just had an idea for an invention; mens underwear with an extra absorbent front area
because, no matter how much you shake it, theres always a little dribble and sometimes if you have thin or no shorts it soaks into your pants.. albeit a very rare ocasion, its still an issue
maybe its just me

from Jun 2, 2006

8:15 AM

my phone is now hacked back to its regular self.
SLAYER ringtones and everything!

from May 30, 2006

9:34 AM

worst tech product ever - AOL and Realplayer a close 2nd.
read dailyplacebo's write up.
this dude is hilarious

from May 25, 2006

11:52 AM

re: boneless buffalo wings
if it has no bones.. how can they call it a wing?

from May 19, 2006

8:32 AM

me: i have "greatest american hero" stuck in my head
rita: oh my
rita: Look at what's happening to meeeeeeeeee . . . I can't believe it myself . . . .
me: suddenly im up on top of the world.. da da da.. believe it or not im walking on air.. yaada ya da da daa da da
rita: that's the one
me: they need to bring that show back
rita: whatever for?
me: two words... "magic pajamas"

from May 13, 2006

2:31 PM

damn you mother nature!

from May 5, 2006

8:45 AM

where my dogs at? i havent had that many comments on my blogs for a while.
are they sucking? do i post too many? if you laugh when you read it post "i laughed" or even "lol" just so i know you were here.

-the managment

from May 3, 2006

7:27 AM

kill me. i've had that Styx song, "babe i love you..." stuck in my head for like 3 days
No Arigato, Mr. Roboto.

from Apr 27, 2006

2:04 PM

have i mentioned that i hate ipods?

this is a discrace to hoodies.

from Apr 20, 2006

7:39 AM

this is just all kinds of wrong.

from Apr 17, 2006

1:56 PM

while im on the catholic rant, here's my take on Confession, in a nut shell.

"hey man, sorry i fucked your wife"

"it's all good. thanks for being honest. just wash my car and we'll call it even"


from Apr 14, 2006

10:45 AM

9/10ths? who came up with that scam? gas is always $2.83 or whatever and 9/10 . which basicly means a whole cent. so its $2.84 and they are lying to you. I want my 1/10 back!!

from Apr 7, 2006

1:32 PM

J-slim: i got a study book on "mechanical and spatial aptitude", and this shits kinda hard!
me: what the shit?
J-slim: they have a study section that teaches you how to guess
me: that rules

from Mar 27, 2006

8:02 AM

They used that real Simpsons intro thing i posted on the last new Simpsons episode! thats frickin sweet.

from Mar 17, 2006

2:26 PM

thats what i like. thanks god.
also, the smell was Tannery Wastewater. ew.

1:21 PM

it smells like a thousand rotten eggs having a farting contest out in the shop right now.
fucking gross.

from Mar 13, 2006

11:16 AM

...Shitty-Shitty Bang-Bang we love you!

from Mar 9, 2006

12:18 PM

I'd like to clear something up. I dont hate portible music players. just ipods, because of what they represent.

from Mar 7, 2006

1:22 PM

from Mar 1, 2006

1:26 PM
i bet this blog is off the chain!

from Feb 28, 2006

12:05 PM

what is it with signs on moving vehicles and freaky animal-human hybrid pictures? snapped this one walking back from coffee. it was Tom Cat Moving. more like freaky human-cat moving. click for bigger. (again shitty camera phone)

from Feb 23, 2006

11:36 AM

i just made the perfect cup of coffee. i havnt had such a perfect blend since that pre mixed cup at Dunkin Donuts in New Jersey. Office coffee is hit or miss here but its usually a good brand. today it was Starbucks Beans. I used 3 splendas, 1 CoffeeMate, 1/3 cold tap water and the rest triple strength office brew. Its a little taste of heaven.

from Feb 21, 2006

8:46 AM

ahh, Bill & Ted's Exellent Adventure. Metalheads and Time Travel. What more do you need in a movie? oh yea good acting. How in the fuck-all that is reality did Keanu Reeves get as huge as he has. He's forever going to be Ted to me in every movie that he makes. Poor Alex Winter (Bill)... He did some rad shit tho in the 90's like Eddie the Flying Gimp and that movie Freaked which was rad. IMDB that fool. I think he's a director now.. suck on that Neo.

from Feb 15, 2006

12:06 PM

i just blogged the shit out of you!

from Feb 13, 2006

8:34 AM

why did i just post that pic? now i have to look at that freaky ass DOG with people eyes.
also, the cold is back. space heater working overtime today.

from Feb 7, 2006

9:00 AM

drums drums drums

from Feb 3, 2006

1:59 PM

when i think about it, timezones kinda freak me out. how can you just mess with time like that?
as usual im probably over thinking it.

from Jan 31, 2006

11:30 AM

looks like its about time to trim the ol' flavor saver.

8:18 AM

Holy shit, Coop commented on my blog!

from Jan 27, 2006

9:20 AM

i have the taste of gas station coffee and mexican twinkies lingering on my burnt tounge.

from Jan 24, 2006

1:12 PM


Chupe mantequilla de mi culo:
trsl: "Suck butter from my ass!"

from Jan 23, 2006

12:25 PM


"Carl: Yo, you want some of these Funyuns?
Phil: Word.


11:40 AM

Dude, fuck Krispy Kremes. regular classic style donuts rule.

from Jan 21, 2006

3:07 PM

image and post below made from my mobile phone. bored last night at this chicks house.
i rock harder than Mt. Rushmore.

1:23 AM

Oh yeah l almost forgot, MTV sucks my ass.

from Jan 16, 2006

11:02 AM

my teeth still fucking hurt. Also i finally got some Mp3s on my phone.

O'Doyle Rules!

from Jan 12, 2006

7:25 AM

can it be possible? a BAD McGriddles? its true, something didnt taste quite right with my mcgriddle. join me in a moment of silence.
ok get back to work fuckers.

from Jan 11, 2006

10:42 AM

I'm starting to feel like im writing my shit just so I can read it over and over

10:02 AM

Best Box Set name i've seen this year. "SONGS FROM THE STREET"
Seasame Street's 35th anneversary box set of remastered songs.
fucking nice!

from Jan 10, 2006

4:30 PM

i think while my tounge was numb yesterday i chewed the shit out of it because it hurts and it feels like raw hamburger meat on that side..... shit.

3:40 PM

um......... so, yea. I hate work. who's with me?

from Jan 9, 2006

5:01 PM

my mouth just got its ass kicked by my dentist.

7:55 AM

I've found that, the cooler the weekend is, the shittier Mondays are. the cherry on the top of this shit-cake is that i get to go to the dentist again today. yay for me!

from Jan 8, 2006

12:41 AM

Huzzah, I went to the god damn mall again. Am I a fucking sadist? no, I wanted new hats . I took J-Slim with me because he seems to always find cool hats. We walked up and down that whore of a place and i finally found 2 pretty sweet ball caps. we both had the feeling we were going to get in a fight the whole time. got hastled by the cellphone kiosk mafia about 40 times too. "no, dude, for the 10th time, I dont need a new wireless plan. especially not from the mall, and more so, not from a kiosk fag.

from Jan 7, 2006

9:50 AM

i went to the mall last night. I havent been to the mall in a long time and it reminded me that i hate the mall. the cool kids shop there, and the uncool kids work there. also, i felt like i was going to have to get in a fight with some of those punk ass wanna be gang banger loud stereo motherfuckers.

from Jan 5, 2006

1:21 PM

the new subway by my work sucks. when i say i want a 12" BMT on wheat that doesnt mean i want a 6". and dont start putting tomatos or american cheese on my shit until i say what i want on it. those fuckers made me forget i wanted olives on my shit

10:25 AM

i just realised why no one comments on my shit. because 80% of the Blogger pages on here are in fucking Spanish or some other wierd language. click the NEXT button in the navbar and see what i mean.

7:42 AM

Gas station coffee is hit or miss. Today was a miss. The highlight of the morning tho was a crazy guy getting busted by the cops for pissing on the air and water thingy.

from Jan 4, 2006

5:49 PM

yea stud you just blew $400 on an ipod video. now you can watch movies on the smallest TV ever made.

9:21 AM

oh yea, "Unpainted Huffhines" if you know it you win a Corvette*!
*there is no corvette.

9:09 AM

the bulk of the problem with my teeth is that one of the perks of being a rockstar isnt a dental plan. I think sometimes it would be better to just have them all pulled and just get a really nice set of dentures and be done with it. then those Super Polygrip commercials with Florence Henderson would mean somthing to me.

from Jan 3, 2006

4:04 PM

i made a new blog about my bitterness and hatred toward the major music industry.
check it out here.

3:06 PM

ok rad a whole day successfully wasted on this stupid thing.

2:18 PM

i took a fat shit earlier. I can still feel my asshole contracting back to normal size. this is what porn stars must feel after a hard days work.

12:31 PM

jimbo: is it sad that while I'm at work and should be working I'm fooling around with learning CSS and iframes?
kirk: sadder is that im at work, not working making you not work to help me